This month has been a very ‘interesting month’ so far. We had the good news that my first book would be ready to be released in July [super excited, scared, elated, worried and many other emotions all wrapped up into one]. Then there was the roller coaster that followed with my mom’s diagnosis and surgery. But as she so rightfully said it, she is highly blessed and favored, so I am going to lean on faith knowing that prayer and deeds have worked and will work. In light of this roller coaster, my mom and I have been having a lot of quieter moments where the earth stands still and I learn who, what, and why [for anyone who has older love ones in their lives, I recommend you do this, as it can be life changing].
During one of those moments, I received a trans-formative revelation. No I am not adopted; it was not that type of revelation [I know at least one reader went there]. What my mom revealed to me, and mind you she said in such a matter of fact way, I had to ask a few times for her to repeat and explain. Apparently early in her pregnancy with me, the doctors discovered that I was an ectopic pregnancy……now for anyone who has ever experienced a pregnancy, taken a biology course, read a “what to expect when expecting” type of book; or if you are anything like me you are turning to Google….You would understand that statistics say that it should not be possible for me to be able to type these words tonight, as statistics/research says that ectopic pregnancies have a very high rate non survival. And from my research using Google and visiting a few websites and a book or two, it appears to be a very rare occurrence for a tubal pregnancy to survive, go full term and by all accounts turn out okay [Disclaimer, I am not in the medical field, nor am I am a professional researcher, so feel free to research for yourself, all I do know based on my research, my survival was/is a rare thing]
So, this revelation had me thinking for the rest of the weekend, and after analyzing it over and over again, I have come to a few conclusions.
No matter what my surroundings may look like, with God I will find my way. Maybe I need to type the next few words slowly, or maybe you should just read it slowly to get the slow-motion effect you get from movies …. people…I…was…in…the…tubes [typing that was actually fun, but you get the picture]. I was not where I should be, there were no resources in my immediate surroundings to nourish my growth. There will be many times when you will be in a similar position, you just won’t have enough resources, you may be in an environment where there are no mentors, supportive love ones or anyone who believes in you. You may have a dream where you feel ill-equipped and inexperienced to achieve your purpose. But guess what, you don’t have to be ready or have the resources or know the right people for God to do his work for you and through you. Stop thinking that miracles only happened in the Bible and for perfect people; go deep into the pages to find the truth. For outside of Mary and a few selective others, many of the miracles were performed for some shady characters [I may read my bible a little different than everyone else but this is how I see it]. David who was beloved, stole a man’s woman. Solomon, with all his wisdom, had enough women to start his own million-woman march. Moses killed an Egyptian. Peter punked out and denied Jesus [I call it how I see it, not meant to offend anyone]. Abraham lies and disowned his own wife to save his life…. not to mention sleeping with his help. Saul, who later became Paul, went around having people killed…. the list can go on and on. To me this says that no matter where you have been or where you are now…. no matter how undeserving you think you are… your journey is not over, you still have the right to dream. And not just simply dream, but with God’s favor you can achieve and surpass any dream that you can imagine.
I don’t have to be like everyone else, my path is my path. So, I have mentioned before that you should run your own race, and that you shouldn’t compare your effort to someone else’s journey. Clearly, I was not about following everyone’s path even as a fetus [see… you cannot blame me, my control issues run deep]. Nonetheless, I think sometimes you have to go your own way. You may have to go the unchartered path away from everyone else for you to achieve your goals. Now I am not saying that you must jump off a cliff, then again maybe I am [not physically people], but sometimes you must go way out of the box to find your purpose and to follow your dream. Greatness is not achieved while being comfortable and waiting for others to support your dream – they may delay or even stop you from ever taking the first step…..I’m just saying your dream is your dream for a reason.
I wouldn’t be here, if there wasn’t something that I was meant to do. This is not just about me, this is about you too. We all have a purpose, we were already destined before we were born [clearly even before we were conceived]. Stop letting people or your surroundings limit you. You wouldn’t be on this planet unless there was a reason. Some people reach their seasons very early in life, some of us take a little more time to find our way and to get where we need to be and to think the way we need to. No matter your path, no matter your beginning….you will get there.