Today is day three of seven and I am starting to feel really good about my self-imposed challenge of blogging for the seven days of my Birth Week…Seven days Uncle…not a month…just seven days [family joke]. This year, I have seen doors open for me that I had no way of predicting, and no way of getting there on my own. I have received kindness from others….and I have also seen the negativity in others… Nonetheless just as I have chosen to let go and to love…I have also chosen to give back.
Eagles fly together, we rise together. Last month, I participated in a project with a group of companies and wonderful people from InsideSkn, CreateOneMedia and Necessary Beauty, partnering on an InsideSkn Interview with Deidre Hector (@reachnfetch), an up and coming philanthropy practitioner based in New York. This team of wonderful people came together to show the world the talent and positive energy that Ms. Hector is bringing to the nonprofit and art industry. I was very proud of the energy that came from each professional, as they combined their own unique gifts to help another person soar. In today’s over competitive environment, where people are very quick to break each other down and ridicule the efforts of an up and comer…..this event stood out. But although it was a very inspiring moment, it was unfortunately just that -a moment. If I had my way, it would not be just a mere moment, but a movement where each eagle would use their wings/their resources and reach to help lift another eagle, until the effect continues to be seen worldwide. I no longer believe that my thoughts are to be limited to just dreams, so even if it starts with just me and my squad of eagles, the movement will begin.
There is no reason that I can think of, why people have to break down each other and not lift each other up. The only person you should compete with is yourself. Yes, I know many of you who ran track or played similar sports are shouting at the blog screen and saying Lisa, you have to compete with the other person, or as society calls it the “competitor.” And I am going to whisper back to you, No, you don’t. You have to compete with yourself and you alone. You have to push yourself to be better than you were yesterday; you have to be faster; you have to be stronger. What the other person is doing should not affect your output. And yes, you can still look over and see what they are up to. But that glance should only inspire you to stay in your lane and do what you need to do for your race/for your destiny. Do you really think that Bolt is concerned about what the other runners are doing? If he did, he would be satisfied with just winning or beating them by a few seconds, because in the end a win is a win? But he doesn’t just win, he dominates his game and leaves the “competitors” behind. Stop seeing everyone else as your competition, learn to appreciate the beauty and gifts within the next person; go a step further and give them your support. It’s not going to take anything from you to tell someone that they did a good job or you like what they are doing…. even if it’s just to tell them that you like the way they rock their favorite lipstick. The sky has enough space for all of us to be stars; there is no reason to dim someone else’s light for you to shine. Everyone can shine together and bring some positive light to a seemingly dark environment.
Everyone you meet is not going to want or know how to fly. This may sound weird to you, but it is a sad yet true fact of life. Not everyone is ready to let go of their grip on their ground. For some, it may be because they can’t see past their inherited acceptance of their positioning in life. For others, it is due to a fear of failure, a fear of letting go of what they have come to know as truth. Looking in from the outside, you can see that they are holding on to an imaginary and fragile line. But without a life shattering and reality shifting moment, they will never be able to see what you see or feel what you feel. For these individuals, there isn’t much that you can personally do. It’s not like you can lift them up and shake them until common sense rattles around in their brain…. that is illegal in most countries. What you can do, however, is pray for them; to pray and pour positive words into the universe that they will someday¾hopefully soon¾wipe the crust from their eyes and look up to the horizon before them. You can and should also live a life that shows them that they too can do it. Because the truth is, sometimes we don’t have enough examples to show that success is truly achievable. This will require transparency, as you will have to be willing to say, “Hey, this is where I was, this is what I had to do, and this is where I am going to go.” This may be easier said than done, since many of us hide behind our perfect smiles, perfect families and perfection. But the truth is, if we were honest, we know we had to battle through our own levels of doubt and fight our way to where we are now. And maybe if we were honest with our climb, so many others wouldn’t be scared to take their first steps.
Beware of those who appear to help but are in fact tearing you down. It would be all great if we could all get along and play in the sandbox together, sharing our toys and our juice boxes. But in reality, we are not there yet…. someday we will be. Until that day happens, please be aware of golden knights who appear as cheerleaders and mentors. Not everyone is trying to build you, some are in fact trying to take from you and some are secretly working hard behind your back to break you down, in fear that you rise up above them [not everyone is comfortable existing in someone else’s shadow -even for a moment]. You have to pray on it and ask God for clarity to see who was sent to help you build or get better, and who are the ones who carry alternative shadows within them. If you do happen to encounter such a person, don’t dwell on the manipulation or the hurt. Try to see it in another light, know that you had to be that good for them to see you as a threat in the first place, and take that positive energy to help someone else. This way only positive energy travels throughout the universe and the negative energy is laid to rest.
Be sure to check out Deidre Hector’s Interview at www.Insideskn.com